gather round, chillum – time to explain the debate drinking game

since the Republic has been saved, McSame will deign to make an appearance at the first presidential debate.  huzzah! 

in preparation for this event, please read and memorize these rules:

" Coward McCain Will (Maybe?) Show Up Tonight, So Here’s Your Debate Drinking Game!

Oh look a 'reason' to drink, tonight.Whew, that was close. Goofy old national joke John “Walnuts!” McCain had threatened to skip tonight’s debate unless he, uh, solved the Financial Crisis. Luckily for us, the 500-year-old clown can’t “keep his word” for more than a few minutes, so of course he’ll be at the debate tonight, unless he changes his mind again, which happens often when you can’t remember what you just said and have no idea what you’re talking about, anyway. So, huzzah, we will get to drink on a Friday night after all! Get out your iPhone or whatever and make a shopping list, because it’s time for Wonkette’s Famous Debate Drinking Game!

RULES & DEREGULATIONS: “Drink” means a hit off your beer or wine, or a shot of spirits — unless we specify what you are to drink. If you lack the specified spirit, just have two gulps of whatever you’ve got in your hand — unless it’s a penis in your hand. Save that for later: We are in a crisis. You may substitute whatever pills — except vitamins — or smoke your marijuana or whatever when the Game requires you to consume a specific pill. Generics are acceptable only if you can afford the name brand. “Thrift” is the new style for those with Health Care! (Or a good Rx dealer.)

Whenever John McCain says “My Friends”:

Two drinks (or one shot), poke the breast of the person to your right and smile creepily.

When Barack Obama shakes his head with dignity:

Shake your own head with dignity, take the beverage from the person to your left, and tell them to go get you a new drink because you are not going to get AIDS from their backwash/lipstick. "

….

read the rest at Wonkette

 

be there, be square, be ready to drink.   and to liveblog, if you dare.

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8 thoughts on “gather round, chillum – time to explain the debate drinking game

  1. Whenever John McCain says “My Friends”:
    Two drinks (or one shot), poke the breast of the person to your right and smile creepily.
    this is the only one of the rules I need to remember. keeping tracks of the "My Friends" is enough to get me way, way, way beyond drunk.

  2. I do approve the superior calibre and noble virtues bestowed upon the imbibing of booze, the quaffing of cocktails, in honor of our fine debatueauaires.To your stations, gentry!Here's to tippling and nippling! Watch it."Chillums"? Why, you've already begun haven't you?

  3. You are so funny woman!But since I'll be watching it by myself, I'll have to poke my own breast and smile creepily…that's kind of scarey, mariser…&:oS

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